HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN

• Take off clothes while sitting on edge of bed and leave them in a pile.
• Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see your wife along the way, whistle and make the "woo" sound.
• Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to see if you have any pecs (no), scratch your privates.
• Get in the shower.
• Don’t bother to look for washcloth (you don’t use one).
• Wash your face.
• Wash your armpits.
• Shampoo (do not use conditioner).
• Make a shampoo mohawk.
• Pull back shower curtain and look at yourself in the mirror.
• Rinse off and get out of the shower. Fail to notice water on floor because you left the curtain hanging out of tub the whole time.
• Partially dry off.
• Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles.
• Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on floor.
• Leave bathroom fan and light on.
• Return to bedroom with towel wrapped around your waist.
• Throw wet towel on bed. Take 2 minutes to get dressed.